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LISTS
January 1st, 2026
Apocalypse Wrapped: 2025
May all the movies you wish to see get an extended run in theaters near you.
BOOKS: Adverbs - Daniel Handler (2006)
Contrary to an inside joke that I don't know what Harry Potter is, I did actually grow up reading all the books. But for me, the real Award for Most Affecting Formative Years Lit went to -- and, barring any horrific behavior by its author, will probably always go to -- A Series of Unfortunate Events. It probably explains a lot about me, that my favorite books as a kid were the word-nerdy ones about orphans and secret organizations and fires and contraptions and literary references I wouldn't understand until decades later. I grew up with Lemony Snicket, and so maybe it's no surprise that as an adult I would return to the same author sans pen-name with Adverbs.
I don't think I would have appreciated Adverbs had I read it any earlier. I'd tried to make the jump to Handler's adult novels long before this, sometime around the transition between high school and college, and felt they didn't stick. The Basic Eight and We Are Pirates were both likeable enough reads, I thought, but not necessarily for me. I remember feeling disappointed that they didn't resonate the way I'd hoped. Now, looking back (ten years??? is that the math, jesus h) I'm inclined towards a different explanation: I was not an adult. I mean, legally, sure, but, at least speaking for myself, nineteen was not my best work. It was less about not knowing what Handler was talking about in these books, and more about not knowing myself. So it came as a lovely surprise and, really, a relief, when I fell in love with Adverbs.
Adverbs is a book about love. Immediately, Arguably, Briefly, Collectively, Wrongly, and so on. I can't really say any more because to describe the thing is to flatten it, I think -- the description is never the point, is it? What's the use of telling you about the kinds of love in the book? Like telling you the chord progression of a song. A, G, D, Bflat. Who cares? Don't wait for me to explain it. Just go listen.
Recommended for people who fall in love with friends and family and good people and bad people and places and things and strangers and everything.
Honorable Mentions:
It Lasts Forever and Then It's Over - Anne de Marcken (2024)
The Spear Cuts Through Water - Simon Jimenez (2022)
And Then? And Then? What Else? - Daniel Handler (2024)
Mrs. Caliban - Rachel Ingalls (1982)
The Memory Police - Yoko Ogawa (1994)
The Starving Saints - Caitlin Starling
Walking Practice - Dolki Min (2023)
MUSIC: Better Dreaming - tUnE-yArDs
I HEARD YOU WANTED TO DANCE SO I GOT YOU AN ALBUM THAT MAKES YOU DANCE. HOW BIG IS THE RAINNNNNBOWWWWWWW?
Honorable Mentions:
I Got Heaven - Mannequin Pussy (2024)
MAYHEM - Lady Gaga
Ones and Sixes - Low (2015)
Black Hole Superette - Aesop Rock
Moot! - Moin (2021)
EXHALO - Juana Molina (2024)
DOGA - Juana Molina
Sonho Real - Flavia Coelho (2017)
TELEVISION: Twin Peaks (1990-1991)
I know I'm late to the party, but in my defense, I didn't exist yet! I won't linger too long on Twin Peaks if only because it's thirty years old and there is nothing for me to say here that hasn't already been said. Only that I much enjoyed seasons one and two, attempted the limited series from 2017 and ended up giving up around the fifth or sixth episode, love Kyle MacLachlan, am baffled by James's acting, and went as the Log Lady for Halloween this year. RIP, David.
Honorable Mentions:
Severance (seasons one and two) (2022-2025)
Game Changer (season seven)
Very Important People (season two)
Common Side Effects
MOVIES: The Girl with the Needle
There's romantic, running-through-the-moors-in-your-flowy-nightgown gothic, and then there's brutal, life-is-body-horror-and-you-are-alive gothic. The Danish film The Girl with the Needle is the latter, because of course it is, and of course I really enjoyed watching this moody, spooky, occasionally sweet but mostly grotesque fairy tale.
Set in early 20th century Copenhagen, the film follows its titular girl, Karoline, as she struggles to make ends meet as a seamstress at a textile factory. She doesn't qualify for widow's benefits because her soldier husband is presumed dead but still officially missing in action. Then she begins a relationship with the factory owner and gets pregnant. And then her husband comes home disfigured wearing an insane 1900s mask. And then the titular needle shows up and I made some kind of animal noise and flinched until it was over. And that's just the first act!
Beautifully shot, intensely performed, and scored with this sick fusion of orchestral strings and piano and industrial electro drones. I am realizing as I type this that maybe that sounds crazy? I haven't really been able to recommend this to anyone, but that's pretty much par for the course. Recommended anyway for fans of classic horror, modern true crime, and gothic shit of all eras.
Honorable Mentions:
Sorry, Baby
Fancy Dance (2023)
Mickey 17
SLC Punk! (1998)
On Becoming a Guinea Fowl (2024)
Hedda
Corpus Christi (2019)
Problemista (2023)
Sinners
Tampopo (1985)
The Red Shoes (1948)
Dahomey (2024)
Monster (2023)
Perfect Blue (1997)
The Fall (2006)
All About My Mother (1999)
Woman at War (2018)
GAMES: Lorelei and the Laser Eyes (2024)
Okay, here's the thing. I loved Blue Prince for the first thirty hours. I really did. My co-pilot and I devoured it, and had you asked me on Day 40 what my GOTY was going to be, I would've confidently declared BLUE PRINCE BLUE PRINCE IT'LL BE BLUE PRINCE. And then we got to the friggin' Gallery Room puzzles. (BAD. BAD PUZZLES BAD.)
We gave up on Blue Prince somewhere around [redacted], when we'd finally just given in to Googling different leads and realized just how many crates we were supposed to move from that goddamn tunnel. The puzzles had gotten frustrating, and the seemingly endless sequences of RNG required for the barest reward were driving us crazy. (The Closed Exhibit puzzle reward made us so mad, we stopped the session there.) I think Blue Prince is perfect for mechanically-minded people, like unraveling a tapestry that you think has ended but then, surprise, there are always a few more knots to untangle. But we were into the game for the mystery of it, and specifically to solve that mystery -- so every time we got an Allowance Token instead of a new piece of the story, we cried a little.
I preface this rec with my Blue Prince woes not to rag on what is, still, a fantastic puzzle game, but to articulate to myself why Blue Prince made us so grumpy by the end and why Lorelei and the Laser-Eyes was such a blast all the way through.
Lorelei drops you into the game with virutally no context, and two controls: move and interact. The environment itself is a weird pastiche of grayscale textures, and your starting inventory includes car keys and a single tampon. You're in a forest and you have to walk towards a hotel. Gameplay!
What follows is a trippy adventure full of tasty, tasty puzzle-solving and roughly 12 hours of theory-crafting about where you are, who you are, when you are, and why. It's surreal and funny and spooky but not scary (except for one mechanic that did jumpscare us and I did scream a little but only a little I think.) Between thinky standalone puzzles and looser interpretive storylines, it feels like the game rewards both in- and out-of-the-box thinking. When we had a hunch of something new and/or weird to try, it often paid off. And when we didn't understand something, it only tilted our perspective on the story to arrive at new conclusions, rather than stopping us in our tracks. We are also big big giant huge nerds, and liked getting to take longhand notes that paid off every time. Nerds.
This is an all-timer for me. Recommended for puzzle-solvers, film buffs, multi-linguists, and people who also bailed on moving all those Blue Prince crates.
Honorable Mentions:
Blue Prince
Hades II
Dinocop
Rhythm Doctor
PEAK
Dispatch
Restaurats
The Painscreek Killings (2017)
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